After two years of taking natural desiccated thyroids (NDTs), I’m switching back to standard medication for hypothyroidism: levothyroxine. Read on to find out why. (If you want the TL;DR version, then here it is: I’m switching because I think my… Continue Reading →
I saw a dodgy pop-up today. I found its complexity beautiful. It was a work of art. In fact, I like it so much that I’m going to describe each aspect of it in obsessive detail.
This is a post I wrote for escaperoomblog.com, which was a website I planned to fill with posts about escape games. Kind of like an online magazine for escape rooms. However, I gave up on the project after writing just two posts. FML.
This is another post I wrote for escaperoomblog.com. This post is all about UV torches. Yay!
Six years ago, I started a gluten-free and dairy-free diet. Since then, all my biscuits, pizza, pasta, bread, and cake have been shitty gluten-free imitations of actual food. Recently my girlfriend said I should put my expertise to good use… Continue Reading →
This post contains statistics about my year. Find out how much I spent, how many countries I visited, and even how many supermodels I slept with. (Spoiler: the answer to that last one was ‘none’.)
Here’s a vain and boring video of one second of every day of my life during 2016. (To be honest, I only recorded 249 days. I couldn’t be arsed to film any more.)
Because it’s Christmas or something, here’s a shitty poem I wrote at the age of 9.
Here’s a short story I wrote at the age of nine. I unwittingly wrote it in the style of Dan Brown: the sentences are clumsy and the plot doesn’t make sense.
I invest in unit trusts through two brokers: Legal & General and Hargreaves Lansdown. But which is better? From a cost perspective, Hargreaves Lansdown is the winner. That’s because Hargreaves Lansdown offers the same unit trusts for a cheaper price…. Continue Reading →
As featured on <a href=”http://web.archive.org/web/20170305224459/http://kindlecoverdisasters.tumblr.com/post/152900838455/we-can-only-hope-buy-it-here”>Kindle Cover Disasters</a>, “Hillary and Harambe save the world” is a book I wrote: The plot shows exactly what will happen if Donald Trump wins the election on November 9th. Using meticulously researched data, I demonstrate… Continue Reading →
A company called The Retirement Shop keeps cold-calling me. I don’t like being cold-called, so now I’m calling you, The Retirement Shop – I’m calling you out for your annoying phone calls. They call me about twice a week. They seem… Continue Reading →
In this post I’ll provide news about the demolition of Nara Dreamland. Yes, that’s right – Nara Dreamland is being demolished. What happened? Afer the park closed in 2006, urban explorers could roam the decaying park to their hearts’ content…. Continue Reading →
Once again I’m listing my favourite songs. They include the modern-day classic ‘Peanut Butter Jelly’, whose video features the braless beauty shown in the picture above. Excuse me while I drool a little…
22nd March 2016: I keep seeing groups of alpha males. They have perfectly coiffed hair and the kind of bodies that evolution has wet dreams about. In comparison I look like a chav planning to steal someone’s luggage.
In the 90s, my friends liked Power Rangers, He-Men, and Thundercats. I liked an alligator in a pink dress. Her name was Trudy, and together we took LSD. The following is based on a true story. The events have been changed, but… Continue Reading →
Here’s three stories written by myself, my sister, and my brother, circa 2003. They’re parodies of franchises like Mario and Pokemon: franchises that are overbearingly upbeat, carefree, light, and fluffy. But don’t worry, because each story also has a hint of darkness… Continue Reading →
Hello. This is God speaking. Yes, I know, you didn’t expect God to be the host of this poll. Well I am, so there.
During my three-month stay in Japan, I went to an abandoned theme park called Nara Dreamland. According to AbandonedKansai.com, the park opened in 1961, six years after the opening of Disneyland in California. The park’s castle was blatantly a rip-off of… Continue Reading →