I like Aliexpress for two reasons: 1) it’s cheap like eBay, and 2) it has user reviews like Amazon. But what I don’t like is Aliexpress’s shitty automatic translations of reviews. Here’s some example review from something as innocent as a swim cap:
the fabric Is gross
It’s a shame that the fabric was “gross”. I’m assuming there was a shit stain or something.
the fabric Is strongman
Okay, so now the fabric is strongman. This is getting weird now.
I bought son for the pool.
I guess you can buy anything on the internet these days.
let the bears
Let the bears do what? For the love of God, tell me!
pleasant to the touch, thin, hot! yes
Uh… maybe you want to get a room with the swim cap?
There is a marriage
I can see this review would have been five stars, but there was a marriage, specificially a marriage that can’t be removed.
All is lost
There’s some interesting untranslated words here, like ‘misyats’ and ‘yakist’. But what worries me are the other words. “Je smells” for one thing. I know that “Je” is French for “I”, so is the reviewer saying that he smells? Why would anyone admit to that? Even worse is “all is lost”. It’s like a garbled warning from a dystopian future:
Everyone dead … zzzcchzzh … all is lost … zzhzhzhhhrr … stay away ….
But the review ends on a positive note: “all ok. the seller Raja”. So I don’t understand: do I need to panic or feel relieved? I wasn’t expecting such an emotional rollercoaster from a swim cap review.
Yeah. Chinese horseradish.
Hopefully I’ve proven my point that these reviews are nonsense. Ideally, you should be able to turn off the translations so you can see the reviews in their original language. However, I couldn’t find any option to do so. So it seems we will just have to put up with it and let the bears, thin, hot! yes