Nudger’s Christmas Adventure – shitty book I made for my brother

Nudger was a stray cat who used to visit our house for food. We named her Nudger because she liked to nudge us – she would push her head against our legs and arms as though she was showing affection. In hindsight, she was probably just spreading her pheromones over us to mark us as her property.

I made a shitty book about Nudger for my brother for Christmas 2011. Here it is.


Nudger was a kitty cat, and he loved to dance dance dance, dance dance.


On a cold Christmas Eve, Nudger had nowhere to go.


He was cold and scared…


…until Adam let him in.


Nudger curled up by the fire and went to sleep.


Nudger was dreaming of being King Nudger of Nudgeland. Three ghosts visited Nudger, but he gave a great yawn, and went back to sleep.


Suddenly something came down the chimney! Poor nudger was scared almost to death.


Cautiously, Nudger peered around the chair. Santa had eaten too many pies, and was stuck in the chimney!


So Nudger nudged…


…and he nudged…


…until he could nudge no more.


Then he nudged some more. One… final… NUDGE!


Out popped Santa!


Nudger had saved Christmas.


Later the Queen pronounced him Sir Nudger of Nudgington. At the palace he enjoyed a veritable banquet.


Poseidon declared Nudger a member of the Order of the Bluenose, and commanded polar bears to show him respect.


And every Christmas Eve, Santa would visit Nudger and make sure he was never hungry or cold.


But all Nudger really wanted was a place by the fire and someone to nudge. And that he got, and how!


Goodnight, Nudger.

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